I’m banging against the walls. I’m gagging. Trying not to vomit. I’m screaming. I stop. I take the pain. No one can hear me. My mother is dead. She can’t save me. I’m crying, but I won’t break down. I don’t feel like fighting right now. I don’t know how to submit. I wish I could dislocate my elbow on some Mel Gibson type shit. Mommy took me to see Lethal Weapon in first grade. I was special. I was good. I listened. I said thank you. She died. She died quick but slow. She got skinny. She lost her hair. She coughed a lot. She wore white. They said she was about to die on Tuesday night. On Wednesday morning she was dead. The whole family was there. None of them niggas wanted to let me live with them though. I had to go to a group home. Fuck all of them people. Let me out this mutha fucking jacket. I piss. I growl. I want to be dead. No more sickness. I just want to be dead. I run into the wall like it’s 4thand Goal. I don’t get the first down. The Raiders never get the first down. Randy Moss wasn’t the answer. Antonio Brown ain’t gone get it done blood I’m telling you. Gruden ain’t gone get him the ball enough. Remember the Rocket? The Rocket had wheels. He was alright. You crazy, The Rocket was nuts boy, he burned anybody. He would have burned Deion blood. Ain’t nobody would have burned Deion. You can run him over on Madden though. You hella crazy! Boom he’s on his back! Stop it bruh, LOL. You think they got apple sauce? We grown now dude. Ain’t no more apple sauce just apples. Remember the apple tree in big mama’s backyard? Hell yeah, with the yellow apples? Man they was so fucking sweet. Them apple pies used to be so good with the crumbles on top. I remember I got caught eating some in the back room she must have wore my ass out. Boy are you crazy! That’s why we got roaches crawling around right now. Just trifling. I ain’t crazy. She know I ain’t crazy. Let me up out this mutha fucka. The bitch in the courthouse said I’m crazy. I ain’t crazy. My daddy been dead his whole life. He crazy. I ain’t crazy. I ain’t giving up! I ain’t bowing down. Never! Glory be, the fonk is on the bald head man. I’m tired but I ain’t gone sleep. Even if I’m snoring with my mouth open I ain’t sleep. Never. I can’t wait to die. RIP Sandra Blande, she in here with me. Amen. Aye ya’ll drugged me. I know y’all watching. This ain’t no fucking Jodeci video. I’ve been euthanized. A horse! A horse! My kingdom for a horse! Stop nodding man they gone kill you. They drugged me. Take me out this jacket. Take me. Coward ass crackers man. They cowards. I’m a man out here. I’m coming back. I’m coming back for all y’all. I’m coming back. Wake up bruh. Bruh wake up.
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